Getting Old, Part 5

I keep thinking of things I need to consider to prepare for "oldness." I will be there one day. So far, I talked about forgiving myself of past mistakes, be careful of the things I file in my mind, define my idea of a life well-spent and do not allow old age to be a time of uselessness. Today I want to ponder on the people I need to forgive.

I once read a quote about the economy of forgiveness. "Forgiveness is the economy of the heart... forgiveness saves the expense of anger, the cost of hatred, the waste of spirits." I believe that when we hold on to grudges again a family member, a friend, a co-worker and especially when we hold to a grudge against God, we are bankrupting our spirit. We are needlessly spending way too much time, thoughts, and energy on that person and that situation. Couldn't we all use that time, thoughts and energy on something more worthwhile than hatred?

The most foolish thing that we do is to hold onto to a grudge against God. I cannot fathom how God has disappointed you. Maybe he let you down with a death of a loved one, a financial disaster, or lack of a marriage partner. Whatever it was, you may have stayed angry with God for way too long. There are endless books written on this topic, so I cannot pretend to cover this in a brief blog. However, this I know...let go of the feeling that God let you down.

Did you realize that this is one of the three major areas of sin? In a nutshell, all of sin can be put into these three categories: Lust of the flesh, lust of the eyes and the pride of life. To believe that God let you down, implies that God did not provide all that you needed to live an abundant life. You "see something" with your eyes(lust of the eyes) and you are thinking that God should not withhold that from you. Eve did that and for centuries, we have been deceived into thinking that God just did not come through for us. It is time that you let go of that false belief. I know of many older people who cannot "forgive" God for holding out on them. They are bitter and angry people.

Hopefully, you are realizing that there are some types of older people that you do not want to emulate. Well, you do not have to be like that.  But you must do something about it now before you become the person you always said you would not want to be. The cement will harden one day. I am praying for whoever reads this blog that they will take some courageous steps to becoming the older person that everyone wants to be around.

Getting Older, Part 4

A big step to becoming the older person you want to be is forgiving yourself of past mistakes. Wow! That is worth stopping by this blog for a minute. What mistakes have I made in the past that I just won't let go of?  I can make myself sick by focusing on my past failures.

Start with financial issues. I would love do over some foolish mistakes in that area. I continue to beat myself up over past financial mistakes I have incurred, things I bought that I did not need at the time, listening to that guy that sold us the frozen food plan:), buying a new car when we really should have bought a used car. My list may not be your list. But we all have a list of past mistakes in the area of finances.  I can learn from them and I have learned from them.   But I cannot change them.

Next on the list of past failures is all the diets I lost interest in.  I would still fit into my wedding dress if I had stuck with the hundreds of diets I started. I cannot change the past.  I certainly can learn from the reasons or circumstances that triggered a meltdown of my diet. I can change the future in that area.

I must add to this list, the failures as a wife, parent, teacher, or friend.  I would do many things different in personal relationships.  I must forgive myself and not continually dwell on mistakes I have made with people.

I have saved the hard issues for last.  We have all made mistakes, myself included, on moral issues. I know this is a broad category.  I am talking about lying, cheating, stealing, purity issues, or anytime we displayed a complete lack of character. Without a doubt, failures in this area have changed the path we are walking on today. It is hard to forgive ourselves of outright breaches of our "code of ethics." Your standard of right and wrong may vary from mine, especially if the Bible is not your present guiding light. Nonetheless, we have all disappointed ourselves in the way we have acted.

Which brings me to the point of this blog.  I believe that the older person I will become will be shaped largely by the amount of forgiveness I allow myself.  Think about that.  I could have lived,comparatively speaking, a failure-free life.  Impossible, yes.  But for the point of this discussion, pretend that there is person who has made very few mistakes.  However, if that person continually focuses on those past failures, they would be miserable indeed. They can learn from those failures. They cannot change what they did.

I know so many people who will not forgive themselves for past mistakes.  They are imprisoned by these so-called failures. But the funny thing is that these prison doors are not locked. They are free to leave any time they choose. Did you realize that? Be kind to the older person that you will be. Forgive yourself completely. Quit dragging around the past like a weight around your ankle. Get better, not bitter about the past.

What Kind of Old Person Do You Want To Be?

(I wrote this blog 7 years ago! I never finished the series. It's time!)

This topic has been marinating in my mind for awhile. I am about to turn 57 years old in a couple of months. I don't feel old at all!  But I want to determine what kind of person I want to become "one day" when I turn old:) I believe it is imperative to live in such a way now to safeguard the life I want to live when I am older.

 I decided to make some observations of older people that I admire. What qualities do they possess?
True confession...it was easier to think about what qualities I have observed that I do not want in my life and reverse that thinking.

Counter the idea that old age needs be a time of uselessness/retirement/atrophy. I personally hate the idea of spending your whole life serving others in a job so that you can float around on a boat and do nothing when you retire. Or walk along the beach and try new seafood recipes every night. It reeks of selfishness. No matter  how good it sounds on paper, selfishness disappoints every time. Many people have told Mark and I to have a plan for working or volunteering if we stop teaching. It is tempting to dream about "when I retire." Examine your reasons for longing for retirement.  Is it so you can be lazy or simply move into Plan B?

Along that line, many people allow their bodies to atrophy. I can't count how many older people say that they use to walk or they use to work out.  But they see old age as an excuse to "relax" more. This is a death sentence for them. At what age is it okay to wind down? If you are keeping up with my blogs, you will see that I am adding in new exercises rather than slowing down.  I made a choice(I will always struggle) to be as fit as I can be. My knee does not hurt anymore when I do Body Pump. I actually thought your knees were supposed to hurt when you got older:).  Best example I know is my husband. He is about to turn 58 this September. He is like Superman. Best shape he has ever been in his life. He refuses to get old!


Last thing to mention on this topic.  I do not, do not, do not think we are useless just because we are older.  On the contrary, I did not start writing a blog until I was older and had a little wisdom under my belt. Mark and I are starting a new adventure next Sunday with our career class. I feel like I have so much to offer a younger teacher at my school. My favorite blog to read is from my college pastor, 40 years ago. I do not know how old he is now but he is literally reeking of wisdom! I want to be more useful with every passing year. As a matter of fact, what did I even offer to others in my twenties?  I was a taker, more than a giver.

I hate long blogs so I will pick up this topic in the next few days. Maybe you young folks need to imagine what kind of "older"person you want to be. It will take a lot of planning and goal setting to become that person one day.  It will not happen on its own.

What kind of old person do you want to be?

(I wrote this blog 7 years ago! I never finished the series. It's time!)

This topic has been marinating in my mind for awhile. I am about to turn 57 years old in a couple of months. I don't feel old at all!  But I want to determine what kind of person I want to become "one day" when I turn old:) I believe it is imperative to live in such a way now to safeguard the life I want to live when I am older.

 I decided to make some observations of older people that I admire. What qualities do they possess?
True confession...it was easier to think about what qualities I have observed that I do not want in my life and reverse that thinking.

Counter the idea that old age needs be a time of uselessness/retirement/atrophy. I personally hate the idea of spending your whole life serving others in a job so that you can float around on a boat and do nothing when you retire. Or walk along the beach and try new seafood recipes every night. It reeks of selfishness. No matter  how good it sounds on paper, selfishness disappoints every time. Many people have told Mark and I to have a plan for working or volunteering if we stop teaching. It is tempting to dream about "when I retire." Examine your reasons for longing for retirement.  Is it so you can be lazy or simply move into Plan B?

Along that line, many people allow their bodies to atrophy. I can't count how many older people say that they use to walk or they use to work out.  But they see old age as an excuse to "relax" more. This is a death sentence for them. At what age is it okay to wind down? If you are keeping up with my blogs, you will see that I am adding in new exercises rather than slowing down.  I made a choice(I will always struggle) to be as fit as I can be. My knee does not hurt anymore when I do Body Pump. I actually thought your knees were supposed to hurt when you got older:) I have followed a strict diet for about two weeks and lost 8 pounds. I am going to stop saying that I can't lose weight because my metabolism is slowing down. Best example I know is my husband. He is about to turn 58 this September. He is like Superman. Best shape he has ever been in his life. He refuses to get old! Check out his link at the side of my blog.


Last thing to mention on this topic.  I do not, do not, do not think we are useless just because we are older.  On the contrary, I did not start writing a blog until I was older and had a little wisdom under my belt. Mark and I are starting a new adventure next Sunday with our career class. I feel like I have so much to offer a younger teacher at my school. My favorite blog to read is from my college pastor, 40 years ago. I do not know how old he is now but he is literally reeking of wisdom! I want to be more useful with every passing year. As a matter of fact, what did I even offer to others in my twenties?  I was a taker, more than a giver.

I hate long blogs so I will pick up this topic in the next few days. Maybe you young folks need to imagine what kind of "older"person you want to be. It will take a lot of planning and goal setting to become that person one day.  It will not happen on its own.