How does personality type affect relationships?

I am continually stunned at how differently Mark reacts to issues in our marriage!  Keep in mind that after 34 years, you get comfortable with each other.  You predict how the other will respond.  You already think you know the path the conversation will take. And then, out of the blue, you look at the other person and wonder why they are acting that way.

Yesterday was one of those days.  I started the conversation with my dangerous preface, "Mark, will you be open minded about my idea of a project I want to do today?" How many times does Mark hear me say that?  I am positive that he says no in his mind long before I utter the next word. 

However, I continue to ignorantly believe that Mark wants to know...yearns to know...must know how he can make me happy.  Mistake #1. Thinking that our marriage revolves around making me happy! I continue on in that pleasant thought and make my request. Now at this point, some of you will be curious about what was the great idea I had.  Trust me, in retrospect, it was a dumb idea. Mark let me know, in a kind way, that this project was not going to be done today...or ever. His answer was predictable and my response was predictable.  I got quiet. I mulled over his lack of desire to take on my plans instead of his.

Which brings me to the point of this blog. Even though Mark and I have a lot of things in common, we are total opposites on personality types. If you never done so, I would suggest that you take a personality test to determine your type. Mark and I have taken several over the course of our marriage and they do help you understand yourself and especially understand your mate/potential mate. I included the links to three personality quizzes.  Before proceeding, take one of the tests.

http://www3.dbu.edu/jeanhumphreys/SocialPsych/smalleytrentpersonality.htm
http://www.personalitypathways.com/type_inventory.html
http://www.goingthedistance.org/pages.asp?pageid=18155
Many people have had to take a personality quiz for their job.  If you have taken one already and do not want to take another test, refer to the next site which attempts to summarize the similarity of the four basic personality types, no matter which type of  test you have taken in the past.

http://www.peterursbender.com/quiz/moreinfo.html

I make it a point to have short blogs.  I tend to not read long blogs because of time. More on this topic in the next few days.