November is a Good Month

There is something special about the beginning of November. It usually brings cooler weather. The leaves begin to change into beautiful colors. Families can squeeze in a visit with each other. We get to wear fall clothing:). I always forget how much I love to wear some different things. Put away the summer things and get out the sweaters and fall colors. If you are a teacher as I am, the routine is set. I can be more creative because I am not trying to learn their names and habits(good or bad). Our home decor can be spiced up a little with fall wreaths, pots of colorful mums and pumpkins by the front door.

However, November brings about an obsession with food like no other time of the year. We believe that we must try new recipes. We must celebrate the season by drinking a lot of pumpkin drinks and eating pumpkin cookies and making pumpkin bread. None of these are bad in itself. But the worship of the food becomes a problem. We have less time to exercise because of the special activities of the season. We throw up our hands and say "In January, I will begin a diet. I will start over." 

Don't  make these last two months of the year about food. Statistics show that the average weight gain during the holidays is 4-5 pounds. But it doesn't have to be that way. The last two months could be about working on a heart of gratitude by doing one minute planks and praises. The last two months could be about finally fueling yourself and not feeding yourself. The last two months could be about loving on your family more. The last two months could be about giving to a few needy families(use the money you save by not going out to eat so much). The last few months of the years could be about really spending time with our precious Heavenly Father. Wake up a little earlier and rejoice because you can "walk boldly before the throne of grace." I am smiling just thinking about that. November is going to be a good month!

Lose Some Things to Gain Some Things

Lose Some Things to Gain Some Things

Paradoxes intrigue me. The Bible is full of them. Give away your life to gain the whole world. Give away your possessions here on earth to gain eternal rewards in heaven. Those who are meek are great in God's sight. The list goes on and on. This particular blog will be specifically about losing weight to gain health. 

At the end of October the last two months of the year are all about food and celebration.Halloween, then Thanksgiving followed by Christmas. Pintrest is bombarding us with new recipes to make the holiday special for our family and friends.  How come the food does not make us happy then?  In fact, we start off the new year with a 15 pound weight gain and a depression and disappointment in ourselves. For a moment, it meets our needs. It holds so much promise to make us satisfied. But then we crash deeper than ever.
I would like to offer a solution. Is it an easy solution? No way. The good things never are. In fact, the Bible portrays the good things as the narrow way and very few travel this way. But here goes…
I want to offer a Challenge group that will offer a meal plan, an exercise plan,  accountability with others and some scripture to meditate on every day. Will it cost you anything? Yes, indeed. I have NEVER stuck to anything that was free. Weight Watchers,  Jenny Craig, MediWeight Loss, you name it. They are all great. I have tried them all. If you have a plan that works, by all means, stick to it. I am not knocking any plan at all. But I am assuming that you are looking for something different or you would not be continuing  to read this blog. 

If interested, click on the link. Start now with this plan (or any plan) and start January without the extra pounds and more joy in your step. 

Challenge Group
Challenge Group

Making Marriage a Priority

I spoke to a group of young women last week about making marriage a priority. I decided that other women may want to hear what I said. By no means am I am expert! I just spoke what I feel like God led me to say. This is the "edited" version. Safe for all viewers:)
Making our marriage a priority means it comes before all other relationships in our life. I think we all have to come to grips with the battle we are in against the enemy. We cannot afford to take this lightly. The older I get, the more I realize that the verse "he comes to kill, steal and destroy, " is for real. He really means that. The enemy wants to destroy your marriage, steal the joy you can find in marriage, kill the love you have for each other. He is crafty. He will pick the very things that will accomplish his plan. The thing that will drive you the craziest. Because when he destroys your marriage, he harms your children, your testimony, your faith. This was the first relationship that God established...before children, before jobs, before church ministry.

Before we go any further, understand that marriage is not just a sweet little thing about sex, date nights, love notes, making you happy. It is a relationship that defines you, sanctifies you, bring glory to God's name. How can we fight for this marriage? Read first Corinthians chapter 13 if you don't know how to love. Love is not defined by how that person makes you feel. When God says he loves you, you don't bring a thing to the table, not your talents, your looks, your wisdom. He simply "loves." By the way, God does not give a rip about your happiness...do you know that? He cares about your holiness. When the Bible says that "Jesus lives to intercede for us." It means that in heaven, right now, he is discussing you and what it will take in your life to make you more holy, more like him. And that will never be accomplished by "no suffering" life. My favorite phrase is "suffering makes you grow up."

Thinking about marriage in this way brings a whole new dimension to things. When our husbands don't meet our needs, when our husbands offend us, when our husbands sin...how we react to this is the issue,  not the thing our husbands did to us. Find that in the Bible that says where that says "when a person makes you mad enough times, sins enough times, disappoints you enough times, that it is okay to be done? When you have been married 30,40 even 50 years...what our husbands become will be a reflection of OUR prayer life. If we complain about our husbands for 30 years, nothing much may change. But find a woman who prays fervently for our husbands for 30 years, wow!

So down to the practical issues. How can we love our husbands in their language? I think arguably, our husbands greatest need will be physical need of sex. We can't program them to think like we do. Just because we get wrapped up in kids, jobs, and life and we are not interested in sex for long periods does not change the fact that our husbands did not lose interest. They are not made that way. After 36 years, my husband still seems way too interested:). In fact, one reason he may say that he loves me is that he realizes that what HE needs is more important to me than what I need. After years of marriage, I have to continually lay down my happiness and put Mark's happiness before mine. At the time I am writing this, I am mad at Mark. So I have two choices. I can nurse this anger and feel justified in it. I can tell God that I am mad about this thing and see if I can get God to "side" with me:). Ha. I already know what God will say about this. His word is full of his answers of grace, mercy, unconditional love. I know what you night be thinking here. What if he does not serve me back. Guess what...If I serve Mark and forgive Mark without Mark reciprocating, ...guess what, God noticed. 

Last time I checked, the world is still advertising a lot of explicit sexual activity, the wrong way to look at women, lies about women's value. So I want to be the safe place for Mark to have his needs met. Different things work in different relationships in different season. The single most important thing I do is to look as attractive as possible for Mark, not for the world. I am not advertising to other men. You have to ask yourself this question when you walk out the door. Who am I am advertising for today with this outfit? When mark walks in the door, I am thinking about what mark would like to see. He has thanked me a million times for advertising. 

Mistakes I have made are becoming very overweight. Mark still loved me. But he really appreciates that I try harder now.  You know why...I want to be the girl he wants to come home to each night. Our husbands are visual. I want to be his vision.  Every time I tell you things that I do right, I can name ten things I do wrong. I get too busy with other things and do not want to hear his stories. Are you too busy with kids or jobs and you don't want to hear his story? One day you could regret that. 

Things that we do right may be making friendship bread and dancing when we put it in the oven, serving together in ministry, riding bikes together, dancing at end of rented movies together. Traditions is the key word. We could get some security when the world was falling apart but we knew we had a tradition with each other.

The single most used list of things to tell Mark when I want to be loving, but not not feel like it. He does not know this list exists.

http://momlifetoday.com/2013/03/62-things-to-say-to-make-your-husband-feel-great/


Draw a line in the sand and say,"I will put my husband before my kids, my job, my ministry, etc." If you don't decide that today, your marriage will be different in twenty years, when your kids move out and live in California, your job has changed, your ministry may have changed directions.  If you make a commitment to your marriage,  in twenty years you will have a vibrant, growing marriage that has withstood a lot of storms together. Your love for each other will have grown deeper and you will be married to the love of your life!

Do You Want to Be Strong Without Depending on Chocolate?

Isaiah 30:15-16 (ERV)

15 The Lord God, the Holy One of Israel, says, “If you come back to me you will be saved. Only by remaining calm and trusting in me can you be strong.”

But you don’t want to do that. 16 You say, “No, we need fast horses for battle.” 

On any given day, okay most days, I need to find the strength to get through the day. I feel like there are way too many items to check off my to do list! I feel defeated before I even start the day and want to give up because I feel so discouraged…like the battle is too overwhelming for me. So at that point, I have two choices. 

First choice, eat!!!  Eat something that will make me feel better, give me energy, give me strength. I can't tell you how many times I take the first choice. It may be evening time and I have too much schoolwork to get done and I will spend my evenings working on that, as well as laundry and dinner and a host of other things. Eating something unhealthy seems to be a great solution to give me the energy I need. I can sit down and get busy and have a "snack" right beside me and I tell myself this will be perfect.  Only problem is when I finish that snack and I have to stop and get another snack and then another and suddenly I realize that the thing that was supposed to make me strong made me feel weak. Has that ever happen to you?

Read what it says in Isaiah, “Only by remaining calm and trusting in me can you be strong”But you don’t want to do that. 16 You say, “No, we need fast horses for battle.” .

I took that right out of the Bible!  I thought,"God, you read my mind."  You told me that if I wanted to be strong, the way to accomplish this is to remain calm and trust in you.  But instead, I say "I don't want to do that. You were not enough for the kind of strength I needed." God's ways are always going to seem contrary to the world's logic. When the world says to go shopping and buy something you don't need then you will feel better, God says remain calm and trust in me. When the world says to yell at your kids or your spouse and you will feel better, God says just trust me. When the world says to go through the closest drive-in and order something very unhealthy because you had a bad day, God says "Can you trust me, instead of food?' 

The second choice is always the choice that works every single time! There is not enough energy in a candy bar or bag of chips to help you through your day. The enemy will lie to you every time and a lot of time you will listen to him. And then you know what he has the nerve to do…condemn you for eating the whole thing. You just cannot win if you choose that way. Next time you get to this point where you are desperate for some strength, remember this promise:

Isaiah 40:29 

He helps tired people be strong. He gives power to those without it.

How God feels about me

In Psalms 51:3
Going through the motions doesn’t please you,
    a flawless performance is nothing to you.
I learned God-worship
    when my pride was shattered.
Heart-shattered lives ready for love
    don’t for a moment escape God’s notice.

I was over at my 10 month old grandson's house today watching him play with his toys.  I was enjoying seeing him crawl around, pulling up on everything in sight and trying to stand by himself for a few seconds. He is so close to taking that first step.
At lunch time, my son placed little baby bites of chicken, sweet potatoes, cheese and his favorite…blueberries on his tray and Zeph would gobble them up. I was amazed at how easy it was to feed him "normal" food and not have to mash things up for him. After lunch, he would get to play all over again until nap time.

I was so full of love at watching him take those tiny steps toward maturity.   I was amazed and wondered if anyone had grandchildren as delightful as mine.  My grandchildren enchant me.  They have brought to life a heart approaching 59.  Grandchildren do that…make you feel young again.  And then he did it…he turned and spotted me and held out his arms for me. Are there words to describe how this feels?  When he says Pat-pat for the first time, I will start crying as I did when my other grandson said it.

My son said the most profound thing when I remarked how big of a deal that is to see your grandchild turn to you and reach out for you.  He says,"Can you imagine how God feels when he has been watching you do the things he has created you to do and he sees you growing in maturity and then all of a sudden…you turn and notice Him. you not only notice him but you reach out your hands for him to grab you in his strong arms."  Read that again to get a grasp of the way God feels about you.

He is not that impressed when he sees me "going through the motions" of the Christian life.  I am boring him to death when I am busy, busy, busy doing all the amazing things in my own power and strength. I bet he weeps when I say "I am independent now. I don't need you anymore. I'm fine. I grew up to maturity. I am strong without you." If you think for a moment that this is not truth, imagine how I would feel if my grandson say to me,"Pat-pat, I am fine and I don't need you anymore. In fact, I am too busy doing great things so I won't have time to look at you anymore." What a knife through my heart that would be,

Shatter my pride and do whatever it takes to help me realize how much it delights you, Lord, when I turn to you everyday and reach out with weak, powerless arms.

If God asks me to give up cheesecake…is that too much to ask?

And so, dear brothers, I plead with you to give your bodies to God. Let them be a living sacrifice, holy—the kind he can accept. When you think of what he has done for you, is this too much to ask?  (Romans 12:1)

I have noticed that over the past two years, as I have denied myself the junk foods I used to enjoy, the Lord has increased my focus on him. So many Christians do not realize the power of a "denial list." Daniel created a denial list when he was forced to leave his beloved homeland and was taken to Babylon. The richness and temptations of the kingdom of Babylon(like America) could have sent him spiraling down a dangerous road. Instead he decided that he needed to protect his body, his mind, his walk with God by taking certain things out of his life. 

If you recall, Daniel was the guy who got thrown into the lion's den because he bowed down to God and not King Nebuchadnezzar. The background to the story involved Daniel giving up some sleep, maybe lunch or perhaps popularity in order to continue to pray many times a day. I am sure it was not the popular thing for the chosen group from Israel to be against the traditions of Babylon.    

Also, in the beginning verses, Daniel made a denial list about food. Read what happened:

"But Daniel made up his mind not to eat the food and wine given to them by the king. He asked the superintendent for permission to eat other things instead." 

Interesting. He made up his mind that he would not eaten certain foods.  Have you ever done that? Have you decided that once and for all you will stop eating things that have no nutritional value and add way too many calories that you simply do not need? Have you considered allowing "your body to glorify Christ" and not detract from your testimony? There is a clear decision to be made. Is there a single item of food that you could look at and say,"you are not worth more to me than what I will gain if I deny myself a bite"? Cheesecake is a precious food item to me.  I love Cheesecake Factory!  However, a couple of years ago I looked at cheesecake right in the eye and said,"you are no longer worth it to me."

Look at the next part of the story:

"Well, at the end of the ten days, Daniel and his three friends looked healthier and better nourished than the youths who had been eating the food supplied by the king!"

I have been rewarded by denying myself certain foods.  I look healthier than I used to two years ago.  A lot of people have commented on this. Not only do I look healthier, I feel more confident and more focused in other areas. God did something similar to Daniel.

"God gave these four youths great ability to learn." 

God is patiently waiting for us to do things his way, instead of our way. His ways are always going to help us and not harm us. Truthfully, it seems like he is trying to harm us and make us give up wonderful things. But the reality is he is all about us doing things that will bring glorify to his name. Being healthy brings glory to his name. Back to the beginning verse:

"When you think of what he has done for you, is this too much to ask?" 

The End is Worth It:)

Let your roots grow down into him and draw up nourishment from him. See that you go on growing in the Lord, and become strong and vigorous in the truth you were taught. Let your lives overflow with joy and thanksgiving for all he has done. Colossians 2:7

I have been thinking a lot lately about the quality of my life…physically, emotionally and spiritually. Obviously, they are intertwined. One cannot be unhealthy in one area and not affect the others. 

In the past two years, I have made some much needed changes in the quality of my life physically. Hard changes. Confrontive changes. Grit-my-teeth-and-do-it kind of changes. I try to eat a healthy diet and lost about 35-40 pounds. I began to lift weights and ride bikes. Not a day goes by that I do not have to negotiate whether I will make the right choice today. Some days I do. Some days I don't. 

Because it is summer, I ride bikes a lot. I actually would rather not do that. My thighs hurt. I want to quit pedaling and rest. It is very hot and I am uncomfortable. When I am finished with the ride, I am ecstatic! We stop and get a drink at the store and it tastes unbelievable! What motivates me to get out there and ride bikes? The finishing treat, of course. 

The same would is true spiritually in our lives. In order to let our roots go down deep and draw up nourishment, we have to allow ourselves to go through hurt and pain. In James, it says,

"Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles of any kind come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow…"

Do I like the trouble when it shows up? No, the pain is not pleasant to me just as working out with weights or riding bikes are not pleasant to me.  But I like how I feel when I walk through a valley with my hand in God's hand and end up on the other side and rejoice over his faithfulness. I want to tell everyone I meet how thankful I am for his goodness. I like the end part so much and I keep my focus on that and not the pain that I am experiencing for the moment. In fact,

2 Corinthians 4:17 
For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all.

I want to finish strong in every area of my life. I am looking forward to that treat. It keeps me going when I want to give up.